You Deserve To Feel Powerful
How 17.1 and 17.2 Made Me Feel Totally Vulnerable While Simultaneously Badass
My initial thoughts after the workout for 17.1 were, holy crap, I did it! I felt awesome, I heard the cheering from people who came to watch and it was getting my adrenaline pumping making me feel super proud of myself. That all came to a halt when I watched my video and started asking friends about what scores they got.
I was wildly disappointed in myself after checking out my video for 17.1. I had thought I was moving SO fast during the dumbbell snatches, but when I rewatched the video it appeared to me that I was moving at a snail’s pace. The video I attached here was my 7th, 8th, and almost 9th burpee in the final round as the 20 minute timer went off. (You can hear one of our friend’s shouts of excitement after my bestie, Anadin, next to me finished her 20th and final burpee just as the buzzer went off.)
I was completely disheartened when I found out how well some of my friends did in the scaled division and how most of them finished under the time cap. I was suddenly very aware of myself and began viciously comparing their scores to my own (against my better judgment). I wanted to share my videos and score and let people know “hey, I know I didn’t do great but i’m still proud of myself for doing 17.1 a week after a pretty hefty shoulder injury”. I wanted to apologize for not being better.
When trying to write this very blog post, I was at a loss of what to write about. I didn’t want to write in a negative tone to describe my feelings after 17.1 but also wanted to share my experience with all of you. It was then that I remembered an email I saved from earlier in the week, Neghar Fonooni’s newsletter. Neghar had attached an old video of her doing pull-ups from years ago where she talked down about her strength in the caption instead of showing excitement for her achievement.
I see this often with women in my gym, myself included; we say things like it may not be much, but it’s a PR for me, I’m still learning, or I can only do one! Whether or not you just started working out today, last week, last year, or have been lifting, running, doing yoga, etc. for years, you have nothing to apologize for. No matter your strength, ability, or skills, you’re amazing and a total badass. If you just learned how to back squat, HELL YEAH, you’re awesome. If you just ran your first 5k (in however many minutes), fuck yeah, good for you! If you just took your first ever yoga class, congrats!!
There is no need to belittle yourself for the progress you’re making. Women have been told since day 1 that they need to take up as little space as possible. We should workout to be “toned,” but we can’t lift too much because then we’ll look “manly”. What does that even mean? What does that even look like? Who defines what is masculine vs what is feminine?
I want to lift heavy shit and be damn proud of myself for it. We are powerful as fuck no matter where we are on our fitness journeys and no one needs to be afraid to shout it out loud at our gyms or on social media.
*photos by Mute Photography*
I did 17.1 and 17.2 alongside some of my best friends and I’m so proud of us for putting in the work and giving it our all. I write this post not only to share my experience, but to remind myself that the point of my signing up for the open this year was not to compare myself to others, retest my workouts just to beat someone else's score, or apologize for not being better. I signed up to get my ass in the gym and feel strong af.
Runs On Doughnuts & Recovery:
- Wildfire Yoga // helllllllo 5-8 minute yoga flows to jumpstart your mornings with self-care
- ROMWOD // 12-45 minute long yin-yoga-esque flows to really stretch out your muscles, improve mobility, and reduce soreness
- Magnesium & Fish Oil Supplements
- Lots of FOOD post-workout
- 7-8 hours of sleep at night
- Water!! I can be guilty of forgetting to hydrate often but see a huge difference when I'm drinking water consistently throughout the day.
Comment below or message me and tell me about your fitness journey and what you’re proud of. Talk to y'all next week after I take on 17.3!
P.S. I totally slipped and forgot about my dessert cleanse and had a milkshake post 17.2 but I deserved it. 😋